Category: Grace

  • A Very Scottish Angel

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    I couldn’t pick him out in a police lineup. Only his eyes briefly caught mine and I felt a warmth when he sat beside me burly, chocolate brown hair, dressed for the season. He spoke with a thick accent rhythmic and singsong unmistakably from the very north tip of Scotland. Betty Hill? Smoo cave? He… Read more

  • Stay or Go?

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    I thought I was a free spirit.  Turns out I was scary, quite selfish, erratic and definitely unpredictable.  I couldn’t trust anyone because I couldn’t trust myself! I thought rational decision making was for people who had given up on romance, passion and living on the edge. When all the consequences of my `non-decisions’ came… Read more

  • The Liberation of `NO’

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    I have learnt to say No from saying Yes. From crouching fetal-like in self-betrayal. Many times that happened until, by the Grace of God, the connection, the pattern became visible. Yes, it was my yes, that never should have been, that created feeling uncomfortable and unclean. I practised at first in front of a mirror… Read more

  • The Godfather

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    `God’s’ That is the one word that describes me. After many prodigal years I found that out by accident. Killing time, staying uncomfortably, in someone else’s house I read the Footprints in the Sand poem which was in a clip frame in their bathroom. I could hardly avoid it as I brushed my teeth. I… Read more

  • Margaret’s Magic

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    We were big on middle names in my family. Many used their middle name as their first name. I was not too hot on my middle name. It seemed so boring and so old fashioned. I guess when I knew it was my grandma’s name I felt more warm towards it. She was a strong… Read more

  • My brother’s suicide

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    Perhaps because there is no goodbye it was the hardest.  Worse still anyone who has experienced this tragedy knows you piece together your own goodbye with what ifs, regrets, disbelief. And for a long time all this shapes the narrative backwards.  You doubt if you ever knew him, the truth, how he was. Every photograph… Read more

  • Ashes to Ashes

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    I have grown to like the humbling of ashes on my forehead. The chance to speak up in silence the charcoal cross carved on my forehead as my blonde hair caresses. And to look around to see who else is saying today ‘ I am God’s child’ And that is the most important thing. I… Read more